You re getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
Personally, I don’t think there’s intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one? ——Bob Monkhouse
If all the world’s a stage, I want to operate the trap door. — Paul Beatty
You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America’s Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn’t want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named ‘Bush’, ‘Dick’, and ‘Colon’. —-Funny Life Quotes by Chris Rock
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong. —Andy Rooney
Life is like an onion. Why is life like an onion? Because you peel away layer after layer and when you come to the end you have nothing. —–Yiddish Proverb
Dont take life to seriously. No one gets out alive.
Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told, “I am with you kid Let’s go! ——Maya Angelou
Life is not a static thing. The only people who do not change their minds are incompetents in asylums, and those in cemeteries. ——Everett McKinley Dirksen
Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how u react to it.
If you don’t know [your family's] history, then you don’t know anything. You are a leaf that doesn’t know it is part of a tree. —–Michael Chrichton
Life is pain, princess. . . anyone who says differently is selling something. —-Wesley The Princess Bride
Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you’re alive, it isn’t.
Deliver me from writers who say the way they live doesn’t matter. I’m not sure a bad person can write a good book. If art doesn’t make us better, then what on earth is it for. ——-Alice Walker
Just when you think there’s light at the end of the tunnel, you discover it’s an on-coming train.
What a wonderful life I”ve had! I only wish I”d realized it sooner.
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep — not screaming, like the passengers in his car..
If we can’t be free, we at least can be cheap. —-Frank Zappa
Life is like stepping onto a boat which is about to sail out to sea and sink. – Shunryu Suzuki Roshi
Life is a glitch in the universal program
To solve the human equation, we need to add love, subtract hate, multiply good, and divide between truth and error. —Janet Coleman
The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life. —-George Carlin
In life, it’s not who you know that’s important, it’s how your wife found out. —-Joey Adams
